Sad Perfect by Stephanie Elliot

Pea meets Ben at Jae's sixteenth birthday party and they get texting after Jae, her best friend gives him Pea's number and they arrange to go cinema. They go on a series of dates and he understands her eating disorder as well as his parents being understanding too.

Pea lives with her mum, dad and older brother Todd although the household is strained, her dad is more invested in sport, Todd isn't interested in the family much and her mum drinks too much wine, their house is stressed and uneasy.

Last spring Pea had a boyfriend, Alex, who didn't get her eating disorder and dumped her when she loved him and became severely depressed needing to take medication, Zoloft to be able to function again it wasn't helped that her ARFID causes depression, anxiety and also makes her feel like she's missing out on life.

Her mum makes her attend therapy with a therapist called Shauna who never reveals what she's in recovery for herself but she does better with Pea than the psych ward does, even allowing Pea to try new foods when she can but not pressuring her like her parents had done.

Then she starts to self harm with a safety pin scratching away at her wrists after a rocky patch with Ben. This lands her on a psych ward after a tip off from a later revealed source that surprised me at first but made sense.

Personally, I can and can't relate to Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder. I have had EDNOS but on a spectrum alike this since I was around four, and anorexia around age fourteen. Eating disorders are hard to categorize because there's usually an element of cross over and in this book ARFID is a unique one as unlike some eating disorders, you look normal and weight a normal weight and do eat some foods just select ones which often wouldn't sound like a problem but the depression and anxiety with it shows more issues. It was a great book to sahow the role of relationships and how they can help or harm, her parents pushing her didn't help but Ben encouraging her allowed her to relax and challenge herself to try.

I commend Stephanie and her daughter, for raising awareness of this disorder and I hope it helps others to realise they can get better or reach out for help.